A growing body of research suggests that people can experience self-esteem issues in one of three ways:1.
When the world is too good to be true, but true enough to be self-conscious about.2.
When their self-worth is so low that they don’t know what to do about it.3.
When they are so high on self-love that they feel that they must always have it and that everyone else is worthless.
These are not the only ways to feel self-defeating.
There is also the possibility that you feel shame when you feel like you need to do something or prove yourself to others.
So you might feel ashamed that you are self-critical and that others can’t relate to you.
And if you feel that you don’t deserve to be treated as well as others, you might find it difficult to be positive and to have a positive outlook on life.
If you feel ashamed, you may feel anxious about being judged, so you might start to think about the negative thoughts that are coming from your head.
The thoughts might include thoughts such as, “I can’t take it anymore”, “I’m so worthless”, “This is my fault”.
If you think you’re worthless or that you should just give up and leave, then you are likely to feel depressed, which can be quite distressing.
This is because depression can feel very isolating and very damaging to your self-confidence.
And as a result, you could feel anxious and depressed.
So what can you do?1.
Take time to reflect on what you’ve been doing.
This might be a conversation, a writing exercise, or even a quiet yoga session.
You may be surprised at how you have changed your behaviour and how you are feeling, and how much you have been changing your thoughts and feelings.2: Talk to your doctor.
This may be as simple as talking to someone who can help you cope with the shame, to see if there are any options for you to improve your self esteem.
Or you might want to seek professional help, which could include getting professional counselling, or talking to your psychologist.3: Talk with others who are struggling with self-hate.
If your self regard has been low for a long time, you have probably experienced a lot of negative thoughts, including self-loathing, and have had a lot to lose.
Talk to others who have experienced similar things, whether it be as a child, as an adult or as a parent.4: Try to be more positive.
Take a break from negative thinking.
Try not to be too critical of yourself.
Find something positive that you can use as a coping strategy.
Try to become more positive, because you know that you’re not the problem.
And, if you’re feeling suicidal, please speak to your GP.
If you or someone you know needs help:Call Samaritans on 116 123.